The Rudeness Epidemic
Share your experience and tell us how you handled it. Did you keep quiet and suffer in silence? Did you mouth-off at the rude person, or find a way to speak up and get what you want without causing an argument?
Thanks for your blog - I just discovered it. Yesterday alone - a cab driver, a waitress, and my aging mother (!) all were rude to me. I try breathing a lot, and a little silent compassion - but it takes patience and true grace under pressure to remember to do that all the time.
Sunday, September 11, 2005 4:57:00 PM
I can't stand rude people. There is a woman at my office who always finishes off the coffee and doesn't make a new pot. She is so inconsiderate! I always keep quiet and just make the new pot myself because I don't want to start a problem. Am I doing the right thing? Any one have advice?
Saturday, August 06, 2005 1:22:07 PM
Sara- I have advice for you... Unless your job description includes making coffee for everyone in your office you should talk up! I would call a "coffee meeting" with the other coffee drinkers, tell them the problem (without pointing a finger at anyone) and then make a rule that whoever empties the pot fills it. Good luck - Joan
Saturday, August 06, 2005 5:35:24 PM
Here's my problem with rude people - I live in a NYC and date a lot. My pet peeve is women who don't call me back. Even after we've been on a few dates, some women think it is okay to ignore my phone call if they don't want to go out with me again. I understand that this is their attempt to let me down easy, but I think it's just plain rude! I have to waste my time wondering whether she got my message. I wish someone would tell women that men prefer honesty to evasion.
Sunday, August 07, 2005 12:01:09 PM
If I ever noticed someone being rude in public, I could say, "Did your mother ever teach you any manners?", or silently wish that the offender receives a book by any manners arbiter, or underwear as a birthday or holiday gift. I could even be emboldened enough to say, "It's etiquette school for you!" ... I have occasionally read references to the decline of civility, which has given my imagination a jump start. This made me consider the (semi)-likelihood of manners arbiters and other authority figures making rules of an extreme or Draconian nature, which would only end up being impossible to follow. In addition, this aspect of today's world reminds me of the sadness of life's passing. If civility does die out completely, I would be reminded of losses of a more personal nature....
Monday, August 08, 2005 9:20:37 AM
Bill said... I'm really enjoying reading about people's experience with rudeness. Sunday, August 21, 2005 10:57:33 AM
Just in the past two hours I had to deal with idiot cell phone users doing all their grocery shopping while chatting on their phones, completely oblivious to any and all around them; some knucklehead customer at a store for whom I held the door open without any sort of acknowledgement from him at all (I loudly said, "You're welcome!" as he walked inside.); and in an otherwise quiet fast-food place, a teenage girl loudly discussing her sexual escapades with her friend across the table. I would say that her parents would be mortified, though I'm guessing such bad behavior is learned from them. Where do these people come from? Don't get me started on cell phone use while driving. The car companies might as well start making all new models without blinkers since so few people use them anymore due to the fact that they can't turn them on while chatting on a hand-held phone. Aaargh!
Monday, August 22, 2005 3:39:41 AM
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I have occasionally read references to the decline of civility, which has given my imagination a jump start. This made me consider the (semi)-likelihood of manners arbiters and other authority figures making rules of an extreme or Draconian nature, which would only end up being impossible to follow. In addition, this aspect of today's world reminds me of the sadness of life's passing. If civility does die out completely, I would be reminded of losses of a more personal nature. And if I still feel bad about it, I could even pass myself off as a cancer patient, so that I could attend a social event at Gilda's Club.
Today we were swamped, and this woman came in with her daughter.
The daughter wanted me to find a pair of black boots in her size, she brought up the brown ones just like it as an example, so I looked, and we didn't have them.
I told her I was sorry, we were sold out.
Later her mother came up with the brown boots and wanted me to look up the black pair in my computer, which I cannot do because the numbers do no match, I told her, I'll go try to find a black pair.
I looked in all the boot sections in all of the sizes, and I found nothing.
So I told the woman that I couldn't look them up without the lot number, and that I was sorry, we were all sold out.
She said, quite rudely, "So, you refuse to help me?"
I was more or less shocked with this response. It felt like a slap in the face.
I replied, "No, no, Its just I can't do anything without the number."
So she went back and told my manager that I refused to help her.
I almost broke down and cried.
I really do no know how to deal with these kind of people, any help would be great, because I'm bound to run into more.
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